Girls.

A handful of my talented girlfriends in Chicago made a zine of their work and gave it to people for Christmas. Brilliant girls.
A quote that they placed at the very beginning of the zine caught my eye.

"There's a special place in hell for women who don't help other women" - Madeleine Albright, Former U.S. Secretary of State

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I feel her piercing eyes across an unfamiliar living room, it's speckled with girls I've never met, of course not one of them bothers to introduce themselves.
There she is sitting across from me, gathering information with every glance, picking up on flaw's I omit like high frequencies. 'Bad skin, split ends, weird clothes, heavy sighs. THIS is the girl who captured his attention?'
I know all this because I'm doing the same thing. I glance and glance hoping to find a flaw to reap, but I can't find a thing. 'Captivating almond eyes, flawless skin, beautiful curves, an endlessly cheerful smile....THIS is the manipulative little girl that is dragging us through the mud?'
Why do women so beautiful do themselves the dis-service of being so ugly.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

http://www.womenco.com/benefits/articles/308-the-special-place-in-hell


~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~


As destructive as ones anxiety may be, in particular my anxiety, it ends up giving me qualities that I otherwise would not possess. It has become obvious to me that the nature of my friendships have a lot to do with my history with women, girls, whatever. When you're young, girls can be cruel, especially when you're lanky and flat chested and weird and in Orchestra. Needless to say, I was picked on. This causes me, and women like me, to be very selective with their girlfriends, making sure they're not bringing in unneeded drama, that the amount of caring for one another is a two way street, making sure all that petty shit roles off their back. suprisingly it's not everyday that you find women with all three of these qualities, I struggle with them myself! All women do! But because I get so anxious around girls who may be hazourdous to my mental health...I avoid a deeper friendship with them.


Thank God in heaven that I have some of the most beautiful, creative, kind, caring, funny, ambitious, weird women in my life, and that I have successfully entered into relationships with them.

The other thing my bad history with women has driven me to? More friendships with men, guys, whatever. Now it MIGHT have something to do with being the only girl bass player in town, at camp, at school, in the band, and just generally being used to the sausage fest, but I'm guessing me feeling like I can fit in more with boys than girls might have something to do with the fact that at a young age my brain went "Girls - Mean, Boys - nice". ..who knows for sure.


But seriously Ladies. In the end, what drives me nuts about females is that we're pinned against each other, and most of the time for no reason at all! There are two girls (that I know of) that do not like me one bit, a) they have no reason to dislike me and b) If they liked me, I would have no problem with them! Yes men have a bad track record of suppressing women in every way but what is even more horrifying is that WOMEN have a history of suppressing women as well! And maybe that's a mans fault, maybe the media is to blame, maybe, maybe, maybe. In all honesty, it's your choice in the end. Whatever beef you have with the girl sitting across from you, weather her clothes are too "preppy" or her make-up is too heavy, just remember that she's has mostly likely had all the same girly troubles that you have and you can relate to her on every basic womanly level.

Lazy Day (shower)

These seem to be a regular occurrence recently....I feel an endless amount of guilt about it.

Lazy day or not, there's always one big highlight of everyday, Taking a shower. My friend Ben  Billington used to call it (and sometimes still does) a rain locker, I always liked that imagery, so I titled the mix I listen to when ever I shower:

Rain Locker Dreams

"Anyone Else but you" By The Moldy Peaches

"If you rescue me (Chanson des Chats)" Sung by Gael Garcia Bernal and Co.

"Heart Beats" The Jose Gonzalez Cover

"Nantes" by Beirut

"Sea of Love" The Cat Power cover

"Skinny Love" by Bon Iver

It's the perfect blend of sweet charm and calming music that I know the words to and can harmonize with easily. So I always end up dreaming up scenarios in which I'm sitting next to one of my guy friends who plays the guitar as I harmonize along with a ukulele in hand.....*sigh*. If anyone has the desire to learn any of those songs on guitar I will be the first one to sing along :)

Taking a shower is kind of a fantastical experience for me, it's a production each time. I bring in my sisters ipod dock, turn on the light in the shower, turn on the shower, turn off the light in the bathroom, undress, press play and as I open the door to the shower the steam mists up the only light source in the room and I step into my escape. Music playing, heart beat slowing down, all of the noises and the stress of the house disappear and all of the sudden i can think straight and dream up all the things I'm excitedly capable of doing.

sigh

Sounds of the House

The sharp and witty banter of Carey Grant and the smooth Italian cadence of Sophia Loren, Mom and Grace are watching "House Boat" down stairs.

The Monotone hum of my sister reading "Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde" out loud to herself so she can compare and contrast it in a paper that's due tomorrow morning. 

The "scratch............scratch..........scratch" at the door, signaling some one to get off their tush and let Montana in, out of the cold.

The "Daling ling! wrrrr wrrrr wrrrr" of my cell phone, indicating a text messege has been receieved. Jon's feeling better, Erics power has gone out, Andrew wants me to drive out to Alliance again.

Other than that, it's really silent out here, especially in the winter when the house is all shut up. I used to come home from the city and not be able to fall asleep, it was so quiet. Other than the ringing in my ears, I didn't hear a sound. So Sirens, no reggeaton, no people shouting across the hall. There's no hum in Moreland Hills, Chicago has a hum that used to rock me to sleep at night.

The Sirens, the beeps the barks all became one day long hum. But when I visited Chicago a couple weeks ago I started noticing every noise that went on outside. I asked Maureen if she realized her next door neighbors were selling drugs, because I noticed a couple yuppies pull up outside their apt. give a couple suspisious honks, do a quick exchange with a "hood" looking hispanic guy, and speed away. "no" she said "I guess is all just fades into the background". The next morning an alarm was going off downstairs and I asked Chaz what it was "oh that? I don't even notice it anymore, I think it's an alarm or something". It's funny how we can be conditioned to live in certain areas. 

I just bought a ticket to go to Chicago December 8th - 12th. Merry Christmas everyone!...yes, my gift to you is the presence of me :-)

Chocolate chocolate chocolate! AAAck.

tehehe.

I've been sick this week, not as sick as Jon was, lord no, but pretty darn sick. Whats frustrating is that it's the 4th time with in about a month and a half that I have been. And I haven't been sick all year....my body has become fragile since moving here, which is odd because I feel I've been eating a lot healthier. Maybe not as Healthy as when I ate over at the Lowly's ;) Anyways....let's hope this is the end of the sick streak, because I need to be on my feet serving people uncontaminated food. Not looking like David from "flight of the navigator" in my white thermal p.j's.

I'm going to a bachelorette party for a girlfriend of mine that I've known since Kindergarten. It's one of those people in your life that have stuck to you no matter what kind of craptastic things have happened in their life. She's been through a lot, including many a boy I didn't not approve of. But now she has a gorgeous son, a loving husband to be and a pretty exciting life set up before her. She choose a different path than me and it only proves to me that there's more than one happy way to go about life. That's always refreshing to know. Bachelorette parties are always interesting....mechanical bull anyone?

ok...ok deep breath.

Things that make life in Moreland Hills a little more livable:

- Late night phone convos with Joe Goivannetti
- The rolling hills, general landscape and wild life of North East Ohio
- My sisters
- Kate Brooks, and all the shenanigans we get into.
- Forging new friendships with people like Meghan, Sara and David.
- Daft Punk "Alive"
- My Dog and Cat
- Getting to hang out with a 1,2 and 3 year old once or twice a week.
- The living room fire place
- Graphic Novels
- gchat
- Anthropologie Catalogues
- 30 Rock, How I met your Mother, It's always Sunny in Philadelphia, and Greys Anatomy....yes I still love that show.

I miss all of you (that are not here). I need reasons to not be anxiously awaiting my return to Chicago...I know all of you are ;)

Forced Flow

Most of the time when I venture into the pages of this blog it's because I want to see who has updated their blog. Blogs like "Fail Blog" and "Lol cats" and "The Sartortalist" and Mari Andrew never fail to disappoint. Then I look up to the corner of my screen at the little "New Post" Option and I think....I have nothing to contribute to the overall conversation. 

Truthfully I've actually been really busy and emotionally drained, this leads to me feeling a little sluggish and malaise about the world that I should be contributing to in a creative way.....and I'm not, at the moment. 

I thought that moving to Moreland Hills would be lonely, which it's not (That lonely), and I thought I would have a creative burst of energy with all the free time and materials at my disposal. So far, sadly, that hasn't been the case. My paints and instruments lay in a heap in a corner of the basement I fear to go near....mainly due to the overwhelming cat pee smell.......my cat has issues. I've already discovered a forever destroyed copy of "Seven Plays" by Sam Shepherd, I fear the inevitability of others that have become a casualty to my sloppy move home. I have a lot of potential but not very much in the ways of motivating myself. 

It was wonderful to go to Chicago, it reminded me that I thrive off of my friendships with all sorts of people, being around creative, ambitious people reminds me to never stop in the struggle to be one, because let's face it, it's a bit of a challenge at times. Being in Chicago made me want to make the move out there come even sooner, like tomorrow, but that wont happen. While I was there I did a reading for a friend that wants to record me for a Radio Drama, I went and saw "An Evening with Don Hertzfelt" and although the host/interviewer was tremendously awful it was cool to see Don in person and all of his short films on a big screen. Not to mention the main reason i was there which was to help my Friend Ryan out with his Grad school recording. I got to hang out in a recording studio and take film and photographs of the process. I love being in recording studios, they're so neat, as much as I would love to learn that whole technical part of the music business, I'm sure I will always rather be the gal on the other side of the glass. I also got to see a (very rough) run through of North Parks Fall play and I even saw a band do some covers of classic rock songs in Lake View. I think one of the reasons I thrive while I'm in Chicago is because it's so easy to be constantly surrounded by the arts, you're immersed in the community, and once you're in it you're in it.....I can't wait to move back.

Living in the suburbs is a bit different...just a bit. Although I did see my best friend play Bassoon for the Great Lakes theater Festival's production of "Into the Woods". I had my opinions about it, but overall it was a very enjoyable show. (Kate of course was brilliant) One of my favorite piece's of theater, hard to much that up. I've been to less gigs than I would like to admit, and I've only done one thing in the way of participating in theater. I hope to turn this all around very soon. 

Sad news though, looks like I'll be staying in Moreland Hills 2 months longer than originally planned. The Directing Job I got in August wont be starting till the end of January, so I wont be able to move to Chicago till March.....at least I'll be missing the shittiest part of the year there right?.....I figure this way I'll get some experience that wont be so easy to get in Chicago, and I'll have a couple more months to save up.  March is a kind of an awkward time to move to Chicago though. Ah Well. I'll be there as soon as intelligently possible. 

Once again I've blabbered on about myself....how embarrassing Some one give me a topic to blog about and I'll see what i can do.

Beautiful things should be shared.

A poem

i thank you God for most this amazing day by E. E. Cummings

i thank You God for most this amazing
day:for the leaping greenly spirits of trees
and a blue true dream of sky;and for everything
wich is natural which is infinite which is yes

(i who have died am alive again today,
and this is the sun's birthday;this is the birth
day of life and love and wings:and of the gay
great happening illimitably earth)

how should tasting touching hearing seeing
breathing any-lifted from the no
of all nothing-human merely being
doubt unimaginable You?

(now the ears of my ears awake and
now the eyes of my eyes are opened)

A heavenly peice of music written by Eric Whitacre.

Photo's by Grace

I really like this photo my sister Grace took of me walking the family dog.

His name is Montana.

Today was a good day, I need to have more just like it.

Free to be me in DC.

This past weekend I had a very enlightening weekend in DC. Me and my buddy Dave hopped in his red neon and set sail for the capitol around 5 pm on Friday. And let me say, driving through PA in the fall is chalk full of beauty. 

Awww.

I also got to see my second Cousin Katherine. We played mouse trap at her house....I won, of course.

It was so nice to be in a big city again, and it was lovely to meet new people. The lads we stayed with were quite quality human beings and I had a lovely time. I also got to chill with my buddy Todd on the WWII memorial for an hour or two while the boys took a nap by the fountain, twas awesome. Lots of good conversation, lots of adventures involving mouse trap.

I just got back from the library. I've found that my vocabulary is decreasing, all too often have I recently tried to use a word in a sentance that just will not come to me. Out of that frustration has born a new determination to be learned. I took out a couple books from the library, two plays and a David Sedaris book. And I'm going to avidly get back to my love of Logic puzzels, as well as my gravitation towards painting and writing and music playing and the like. I need to do a bit of these each day that I have off (at least) because most of the time when I have a day off I just float between the computer and the tv and my bed and the kitchen...this need not happen anymore, for I will be LEARNED!! (pronounced Learn - ed)

ouch I have a head ache.

Music in my head

There is this song by Esperanza Spaulding called "I adore you".

I've had it stuck in my head all day. And if you listen you can see why...it's pretty easy to get something stuck in your head when the lyrics are all just rhythmic syllables. The title for this song is perfect because I think "adoring" some one is a difficult emotion to express in words and the joyful energy of this song is the same kind of feeling you get when you adore a person, like really adore them. Which is a little more than "caring" and only vaguely similar to "loving". So there you go, maybe you can have it stuck in your head for a while. 

When I have a problem with a person I am in a mutual relationship with, I can usually go up to them and say "hey, I'm having an issue with something you're doing blah blah blah" and I can just release whatever negativeness is inside me and move on with my life. But right now I have an anger towards a person that I don't know and haven't met and I have no place to go to that person and say "ok....wtf." So there's no release at the moment, and it's one of those things where I just need to remove myself from the situation even though a person I really care about is involed. I don't consider myself to be a person who is "all up in another persons grill" but...I'm involved, and I'm angry and I don't know what to do other than breath deep, remove myself and just forget and move on....but how do i do that?.....I think I just need to be patient and it'll slowly melt away to an emotion less intense than this one. ok.....*siiiiiiiiigh*.....

I've been kind of snappy in general lately. And I hate that when I am I get asked "Are you on your period?" or "Are you getting your Period?" no! I'm not on my fucking period, nor am I getting it! Aren't I allowed to be snappy for reasons other than my hormones!?......heheh... right? I think I've been snappy because I've been so isolated. I have two jobs that have started, one I've been waiting to start for the past three months (frustration number one) and nothing else to do,  so I sit and rot for most of the week, this is especially true because most of the time I'm stranded with out a car in the suburbs. So I'm stuck in this house, this house that can be very cozy and very debilitating. I just need to be productive some how...

Thankfully I got out of the house and went to the first preseason game of the Cavs, My Dad had a friend hook us up with some courtside seats, and I got a free t-shirt because my friend Joe is on the "cavs crew".....people go INSANE for t-shirts man....it's halarious. I had some Great Lakes Dortmunder and two plain hot dogs (my favorite). That was nice to get out of the house, and I have decided that I'm going to be a real cavs fan this season, check up on stats and go to games and blah blah blah, I read all about basketball on Wikipedia today and I found out that the game was actually invented by a Canadian!! 

This guy! Dr. James Naismith. 

I mean he was in a YMCA in Mass. at the time but still. Not only that but the first pro game was played in Toronto! I know, the Canadians did something cool! right? Seriously though I love Canada ;)

And yes I wikipedia'd Basketball....a girls gotta know what position does what and what constitutes a foul and all that if she's going to be sitting courtside. 

So I'm sick, and have to work tomorrow morning, and when I took a nap earlier I had deleriously feverish dreams and woke up more exhasted than when I had gone to sleep....so now I'm going to try this sleep thing again....we'll see what my brain comes up with now.

You Inspire me.

Can I be kind of cheesy for a moment?

 I am so blessed to be surrounded by people who constantly inspire me to do the things that I

 might otherwise fear to do. Things like: Traveling to another country, learning a new language, doing what I love to do because there isn't any other way to be happy. These are all things that of course I believe are important, but in a world that doesn't put enough emphasis on the importance of art, community and worldliness, it's nice to be consistently 

surrounded by people who are inspiring to say the least..... and I'd like to do a little tribute here if that's alright with you.

You Inspire me by letting me know:

Work really hard and you can do anything. It's usually worth it.

Don't stop pursuing your dreams. Write the kind of music that you love. Keep a steady head. Music is a 6th sense for some people. Get the people you know that love what you do involved in what you're doing.

http://www.myspace.com/ryancunningham86
http://web.mac.com/rcunningham86

Dancing is an important form of expression. Being kind to others is key. Being a girl out of the ordinary is cool and sexy. Writing a book can be hard, but in the end it's probably worth it. There is no flavor of alcohol you cannot create on your own.

You can put on a play anywhere you like when ever you like as long as you are helping a cause while you do it. Don't be afraid to be smart. Work hard if you want to do what you love.

Laugh as hard as you possibly can while never giving up on the things other people really are counting on you to do.

Live the good life, this involves; Playing the music you love, cooking and eating things that you enjoy daily, showing love to every person you come into contact with. When words fail, communication through music is key.

Watch films that are good, then you will make films that are good. The more you practice your craft, the better you'll get at it. (in Dan's case, Movies and photos) It's never too late to rediscover your faith.

Play the music you love where ever you can, as often as you can, even if other people might not know what the hell you're doing, at least you'll gather a crowd.  There's more to do with your love of music than just play, (i.e. make a tape label, work at an up and coming music venue)

http://www.myspace.com/druidsofhuge

Nothing is impossible as long as you work hard enough and have good beer to drink at hand. Your friends are some of the most valuable people in your life and should be treated as such. Also toys are fun to buy, make and play with.

Be Brave. It's ok to be sad in a beautiful place. 

 "Kissing is a really easy way to feel good about yourself," I said. "But I need to find other ways to feel good about myself. Like writing a story. Or learning more Spanish. Or becoming closer to God. Or learning to cook Egyptian stew." 

I read that from her blog a couple times a week as a very valuable reminder.

http://ytupaltatambien.blogspot.com/

Cross cultural boundaries. Step out of your comfort zone and discover things about other humans that you may have never bothered to know. Make music where ever you are, whether it be in a different country, house, state you'll always find other people to make music with you.

http://indoyear.blogspot.com/

Art is fun. Friends are valuable. All animals need loving and deserve it. Be proud of your height, beauty, style....and don't be afraid to experiment with it. It's possible to love what you do for a living at a young age.....really just enjoy your life.


http://darcieyoung.blogspot.com/

Don't give up on a dream. Even if it's a little different, even if it tears you away from the other things you love for a little bit. Take the pain you've experienced in life and let it show in a beautiful way through your artistic skill. Practice a lot if you want to be good at what you do.

Poetry can be funny. People will pay you to work in the theater. Start a theater company. Find the people you know will probably be awesome and make them your friend. There's a lot of good television out there. 

People will actually give you money to make theater if you're good at what you do, and you're only good at what you do if you're having fun while you're doing it. If you have a good idea, just do it!

http://www.myspace.com/parkersubmits

Making lists isn't actually as evil as you might think it is. New places and change might be scary but you may find that happiness was waiting for you there. Pursuit of the truth is more important than debt. Cook good food, do it a lot so you get good at it. Community is very, very important. Seek help if you need it. Write often. Do what you love because that's the only way you can be happy. 

http://thislivingdeath.blogspot.com/

I can't thank my friends enough for always reminding me that what you love is always worth pursuing. This has been a weird time in my life where I'm constantly thinking about the next step I'm going to be making and how I'm going to be making it. It's always good to know that there are other people out there that I know and love, that are blazing a bit of the trail for me and with me. 

Ok done being cheesy now.

The mooninites like it stink eye.

I think that if I watch a video more than 3 times in a row...I should probably share it with the world.

I find odd things to be funny.

The other day I was watching "It's always Sunny in Philadelphia" With Shawn and I go:

"This is weird isn't it Shawn"
"Yeah really weird, totally something Leigh would watch"

Life is pretty good.

P.S. I was kissed and blessed in Yiddish by a Jewish Grandmother at work today. and I learned yiddish for "beautiful girl".....couldn't spell it for you.

Two firsts for me today

1. I got my first speeding ticket about a mile away from my parents house in huron....uuurrrgg.

2. I reached down the throat of a dog to retreive a childrens sock that it had attempted to eat.

Thankfully I have recently stumbled upon something that makes me happier than free booze on your birthday.

When I grow up, I want to be Cloris Leachman

"Stay close za candles....the stair case...can be trechawas." - Frou Blucher (neeeiigh)

I want to be funny when I'm old. I think that Cloris lets me know that funny carries on to old age. phew. I want to be able to make fun of myself when my health is going and have kids that know it's ok to make fun of me too :)

My friend Shawn said tonight that one of her greatest fears is getting old and wrinkly and dying. I feel quite the opposite. I mean it's not like I'm ready to be 70 right at this moment, but I'm excited to have a big family and lot's of halarious kids and grandchildren and extended family. I think it'll be awesome. I'll be the grandma that farts really loudly and wont be able to stop laughing. yup.

I mean, why are people so afraid to get old? I don't want to be in my twenties for the rest of my life! I want to get on with it and grow in my career, in my talents, in my family, etc. Frankly though, I've never been one to be able to stay in one place for a long period of time....That's probably why i'm so excited about life moving forward and becoming different and new each year, because it means I don't have to move from state to state and country to country to feel like there has been a change in my life. Thank the lord for that.

That being said, my Grandmother Culbertson's health has become increasingly worse this summer, and we just found out that she had a couple tiny strokes that caused her to lose some memory. She's a tiny lady with many artistic talents and skills. unfortunately one of them is not dealing with her emotions, and she had a gaggle of kids that do the same thing (5). Fortunately, Basically most of her kids married crazy, rambunctious people who do nothing but express emotion.....All this to say, Grandma's going to be ok, but she's moving into a different point in her life, and her kids are having a harder time than anyone dealing with it. So prayers on that.

So when I'm old, and my health is failing, I want to be able to make fun of myself, and have kids and grandkids that know it's ok to make fun of me too, or at least ask me how I am! I just want to be approachable is all.....don't worry, I'll work on that.

anyways. Life is pretty great isn't it?

n'amen.

I have this stuck in my head...

My Sister Maddy makes these mix cd's to play in the car, and I was sick of listening to one of mine so I just poped hers in and decided not to care that it was mostly bad rap, and over played R&B......I didn't expect to be so moved by a Jordan Sparks song, but seriously I've been blasting it in the car when ever I drive now.....It's freakin powerful maen!

Love me yet?

Chicago....land of stink eye

So I've decided to Move back to Chicago sooner than expected. Like end of Dec, Jan or something. What brought this about? I make really good money as a server. I've been able to save up more quickly than I thought I'd be able to. and I could probably live off money like that in Chicago. I miss my friends. I want to get started on a music project, a theater project and so on. It all seems possible, so I'm going to do it.

Don't get me wrong, Ohio is beautiful, I love being able to see the stars at night. And fall is going to be soooo beautiful. I think that moving here was a good choice because it gave me the opportunity to gain some experience in things that will be lucrative in Chicago, serving, retail, Directing.....babysitting. This was a good choice, but it looks like I wont have to be here for as long as I thought I'd need to.

So here I come!

Anyone need a roomate?

stink eye wren

Things are looking stink-eye.

Politics *shiver*

I'm really starting to get sick of all this Political jargin. I'm really liking Mr. Obama, and I'd like to just vote for him and be done with him...you can vote early right? Maybe that's the best option for me. For me what it comes down to is caring for the environment/making green energy, reducing the cost for future College students and what's going to be best for the city of Cleveland Ohio. And so far Obama seems to be the best guy for the job. Let's turn the rust belt into the green belt eh? I think that's an awesome Idea, I think I'd actually cry if I saw that happen :) Oh yeah...and I don't want to be doing this whole war thing anymore, but let's be smart about it right?

The other thing is that I don't hate McCain, although it is funny how he's tearing down Obama for being a "celebrity" when he has been one of the only Polititions who has been "Celebrity" enough to host Saturday night live. But seriously he seems like a nice guy....I just don't want to be dealing with Oil and war for the next 4 - 8 years....although he did say that if he became pres. he probably wouldn't be running for a second 4 years....because he's so damn old! no that's probably not the reason.

It's funny how I grew up in a house where my Mom is a republican and my Dad is a Democrat, another thing (one of many) that I grew up thinking is normal, but when I tell people about it they're like "Whaaaaa? How do they get a long?" ...um, they love each other? But this year when my Mom decided that McCain isn't up for the job because he's not as smart as Obama, (and lord knows we need a brain that can fix the mess our country has become) I listened. My Mom is a very smart woman. And when she said that she wouldn't vote for Obama unless he got Biden to run with him, and then the next day he became his vp....I was intrigued.





It's not often that I am passionate about a candidate...I'm mean I'm only 23 but still.



Vote Obama.

Make me laugh and make me cry

(stink eye provided bymikki schaffner)

Makes me Cry.

Makes me Laugh.

The latter coming from my amazing ability to make friends in this strangely isolated place. It's a video my new friend Joe put together after taking a recording of a conversation they had on a road trip...why haven't I thought of that?

The former being a scene from Across The Universe that NEVER fails to make me cry. It's nice to cry every once in a while.

I started training for a job today, I'm kind of just on call but it's good because I'm getting food service experience. The crew that works there is really fun, and I find that I like being up on my feet and constantly moving at a job rather than having to sit and watch the time pass by. I didn't look at my watch today for at least 4 hours (I worked for about 7). Which is why i should be a director and not an actor, haha, because actors have a lot of down time where they can get distracted and be distracting, and being the kind of girl that can't stop fooling with and getting herself distracted....I'd much rather be constantly in motion. Less opportunities to get myself in trouble....funny how that works out, you'd think it'd be the opposite. So I was expediting food today, meaning I was getting together peoples orders and sometimes running them out to tables The one thing that surprised me about working back in the kitchen is how desensitized to food you become. At one point I was soooo hungry, but nothing looked appitising, which is odd because the Pancake house has excellent food, I was just so desensitized to everything that it all seemed...so...usual, I guess. I hope you understand. Maybe you coffee lovers that work as baristas can relate.

Anyways. I have training again tomorrow as a server, and an interview the next day. jobs jobs jobs.

I also have a pretty frequent job as a babysitter for a 1, 2 and 3 year old. I think that child care is something everyone should do at some point in their lives before having kids, because you learn so much from the kids but then you don't have to deal with them 24/7. It's a blessing to get to hang out with them once a week. I also have this directing job that should start up pretty soon since the school year just started and I'll be working with high schoolers. I like working with high schoolers, because they've just gotten to the age where they're not taking themselves too seriously and can begin to make fun of themselves....that's important to me in a human being. besides....I was a theater kid in High school and I wasn't all that bad ;).


There's a bit of my life, enjoy!

The Stink eye Dog

He likes it Stink eye....do you?

My ipod seems to like Tom Waits today

When I was in high school a guy friend of mine told me that in his experience girls always want to put Tom Waits on at parties. Personally that was never the case for me, mostly because I could never get to the stereo before some one beat me to it and started playing some eclectic noise/electronic/jazz fusion stuff on, so I never had the choice to put something on in the first place.....But I suppose Tom Waits can make a room feel a little more sexy, a little dirtier, a little less....comfortable. Seriously I don't see why that would be your default music for the evening. All that said, I do own some Tom Waits and as my ipod is on shuffle, it played at least 3 Tom Waits songs in a row. Maybe my ipod and those girls Craig was talking about should hang out.