What did your Mother tell you.

While I was in Moreland Hills this past week, I did a lot of much needed slummin with my family and with Kate's family. Nice.

My Mom mentioned to me that I should start focusing on two things to blog about, Fashion and Music. I guess those are two things I really love. But there's one more thing I love that she didn't mention I write about, theater/film etc. and the below will have to do with that. My mom said that since I go to shows all the time I should talk about what I thought about the show, and hopefully some one will notice. My mom thinks I'm a good writer, I write in a very "Matter of fact way" she says. Well it means a lot to me when she compliments me because she is a writer herself, and a damn good one. So....why not. 

Let me start with this:

I just saw Twilight: New Moon, for reasons other than the desire to see Twilight. Ya see, I've been away from the city for about a week and I hadn't seen my best buddy Darcie for a while so I wanted to take this opportunity to hang with her since she was headed to the movie anyways with Jocelyn (another roommate/twilight fanatic) and Andreanna. It's 6 dollar Tuesdays/free popcorn, at the showtime kerasotes movie theater in Logan square and Darcie's boyfriend Stephen was giving us a discont on Potbellys, so we could eat it in the theater...so I thought "Why the fuck not, cheap food, good friends, cheap movie and it'll be a pop culture experience." And I saw it.

Holy shit. This movie was not only bad, it was soul crushingly bad. Never has a movie illicited a feeling so close to slitting my wrists. This girl, Bella, is a peice of meat! And she's weak and a sucker for guys with their shirts off that are mysterious and probably a monster of some kind. She get's hurt way too often (physically and emotionally), she's basically a masochist, and the worst part is, I don't believe that she is in love with either of these weirdy part monster guys. Now I must admit that I never read the books, and Darcie said every time she heard me say "The fuck?" she thought to herself, "Yeah, you'd have to read the book to understand". Well that shouldn't have to be the case....I'll discuss that later. No one is ever happy in this movie, even when they're reunited with a loved one, everyone is still dark and brooding and (vomit) ...sorry it just came up. It wasn't beilevable to me that anyone loved anyone in this movie, it was all so "This is how it is.....i guess". The only person that made me believe that he loved another human/vampire/wearwolf was Bellas Dad Charlie, and Bella screws him over way too often. When it came down to it I didn't really care what happened to Bella or Edward or Jacob, really just Charlie who is in about 1/3rd of the movie. The tension wasn't tense, the love wasn't passionate, it was all just:

 "No you can't!" 

"But you don't understand, I have to and I can't tell you why" 

"I wish you could" 

When I express this to my roommates they say  "You wouldn't understand why we love it because you haven't read the books"......ok. No I haven't read the books. And I haven't read The Harry Potter books, and I never read The lord of the rings or the Chronicles of Narnia or any of those other movie Sagas that were first literary accomplishments in their day. And to be honest I'm not really a fantasy or a sci fi reading kind of girl, it's a personal preferance, I go for the creative non-fiction or just non-fiction. But guess what...just because the book series was succesful DOES NOT mean that the MOVIE get's a free pass to SUCK! Now, not all of the Harry Potter Movies sucked (although I haven't seen all of them) and NONE of the LOTR movie's sucked and so far the Narnia movies have been great, and it's not like any of these books/movies really compare but...I'm just trying to say there's no excuse. These Twilight people have taken advantage of a Story that is probably very good and made it into a movie that is half assed and under developed because they knew that people would come and see this movie anyway they made it, they didn't have to care because they knew they'd make a killing in the box office because there is a built in following, and in the name of respecting a peice of "art"....well that makes me a little sick.

The sound of the blood hitting the ground made me laugh out loud.

Now, Things that this movie was good for:

1) Pretty shots of the Pacific North West, I still have never been and the shots of it in this movie made me lust after it a bit

2) Boys with their shirts off; Gave this bored little girl some eye candy.

3) Like many other movies that have been made from a book series that have a built in following, it gave Hollywood a chance to give new life to old and possibly stale acting careers, and it breaks new actors and new faces into a scene that uses Brad Pitt and Jessica Beil a little too often...let's hope we soon see Robert Pattinson in roles that don't involve him constantly looking like he's eatin something awful/seen a ghost/is shitting himself.

4) There was a new Radiohead, Lykke Li and Bon Iver song in there I really liked.

An example of boys with their shirts off with some "He couldn't tell me because he's sexy and mysterious"

So while this movie was BAAAAAD and my eyes Widen in disbelief as my roommate Jocelyn cheered with glee after just having seen a favored book of hers butchered on the alter of Pop culture, at least Washington is Pretty, Potbellys will always be good and I rarely pass up a chance to giggle next to one of my best friends during a movie. 

strummy strummy

Some notes:

There's a fine line between boring strummy stummy music and beautiful strummy strummy music. If you're a guy and you are playing an acoustic guitar please:

a) Make your chords/finger picking/pace exciting

b) Have a good voice or have some one who Does have a good voice sing for you.

c) Shower.

Prove me wrong, impress me I dare you.

Nerd

I feel kind of unbelievably materialistic and nerdy about clothes sometimes. To make myself feel better I consider my interest in fashion and looking nice and having Men look nice to be an artistic interest, fashion as art. It's not about brands, it's about beauty and creativity and having fun and getting excited about cashmere. :) So, even though I get a little anxious when I talk about fashion, because it involves spending money (and me possibly looking shallow?) I am going to talk about fashion a little bit and Nerd Out about the kind of look I would like to create for myself, even though i am some what of a camelion when it comes to a certain "style". For instance when me and Ryan were back in Moreland Hills, OH last month i put on Black Nike running leggings with my Nike running shoes and a white hooded shirt and a vest and he goes "You don't look like yourself, i've never seen you look so sporty before"...I dress differently in different environments i think.

First up, these awsome shoes: Even though i am tall, i think i may soon invest in some black heeled booties like these, because, well, they're hot. Although I cannot afford these because they are FRYE, i look forward to the day when i can afford a pair of Frye anything because they are always so beautifully and durably crafted. so I'm keeping my eyes peeled for a knock off version of these for now, because they'd go with almost anything and since I'm already taller than my boyfriend and he doesn't care at all (in fact he thinks my height adds to the fact that i am a "babe"), why not add a couple more sexy inches? Yes I think so.

So even though this young man is infact a young man, I envy his hair cut, like in a "I want to pull that off" kind of way. And I think i could, the only thing that stops me these days is the fact that I haven't had long hair like i do now for...most of my life, so I'd like to hold on to it till about mid summer? late spring? We'll see.

Things i like about his outfit: that Blazer! Fits him perfectly! my broad shoulders would make the seams burst, but if i could tailor it to my liking I'd steal it off him in a second.

Things i don't like about this outfit: how many religions are we talking about the necklaces here? I'm all for "co-existance" but seriously, stop mocking us.

I am a fan of the wrap dress. I am also a fan of bold patterns and classic peices, of which i think this is. I love the room in the sleeves and the length, because while i do have awesomely long legs, it's hard not to look like a hoochie when wearing anything to high above the knee which out leggings underneath. And who wants to wear leggings all the time!?...hhmm bad question?

Now this shade of green is not really one I'm usually drawn to, infact I'm not usually drawn to clothing that is green even though it's my favorite color. But the weight and the length and the detail and the pattern....such a lovely combination. I would love to put this on with my red/orange slouchy beenie and just boss actors around all day. I feel like I could be taken seriously in this while still seeming fun ;)



I am jealous of this girls forehead/hair combination. The only thing I'd like to take away from her outfit is that pretty pretty scarf. But i actually have one that's very similar that i bought in Vienna a couple years ago. (I love international city name dropping :) )

I hate biking in dresses, but I'd probably bike in that one, if only to just show it off.

This has been an old stand by of mine. Black blazer (i think this ones a little green/grey) white shirt, tight black (or jean) pants. A couple weeks ago one of the buttons popped off my favorite blazer so I have to fix that...but I'll probably abuse this combo till the day i die.

This is a style of dress i have yet to buy (God knows I've tried it on) I love this pattern and I usually like cowell necks too although i always feel a little overwhelmed with the combination of my long hair and a cowell neck because I feel like my face is being eaten by fabric and hair, which seems to be the style these days. At least in Chicago it'll keep me warm :)

Classic, comfy, take it off before you eat anything Leigh.

Ok so. I like pretty simple peices and muted colors most of the time, but what i always try to remember is that pop of color that makes it interesting. a hankie, a chunkie necklace, a purse. I think this woman is so pretty, i don't even care what pretty blouse she has on underneather that functional jacket....wait now i am.

Lastly, I need to invest in a pair of these. I love my off white high top chucks (Even though they take forever to put on) but i feel like some ankle high tennies are something that would contribute a lot to my wardrobe. Grey because I'm realistic, these puppies will get dirty. Also I've always wanted some PF flyers.....uh oh materialism...

AND NOW to nerd out about something Completely different. Ever seen the note book? remember that scruffy heart throb played by Ryan goesling? well apparently that kid can write some catchy shit and have kids dressed as ghosts and gouls sing along with him. I dig, i dig it like a ditch. (is that ever going to catch on?). So here are two songs by his band "Dead mans bones" that you are sure to enjoy.








I went to an open mic night last night with Ryan and some buds, and while the company was lovely two things pissed me off about the whole thing:

1) Everyone played the same acoustic guitar "strummy strummy' life is sad and beautiful crap

2) Not one of these musicians was a lady.

I hear this is just what happens at open mic nights, which makes me not ever want to go to any open mics....

Next time we go i think i shall rock out in front of the mic and tell a joke or two.

Love you.

It doesn't really matter where I am

I woke up in my big, lonely, comfy-as-a-womb bed this morning with a split second thought of "Where the hell am I?" Most likely because I was dreaming about Moreland Hills, OH, and it was all too real. Most likely because you were in my dream and you live in New York. Most likely because You weren't in my bed when i opened my eyes and, well, you usually are. 

It never fails, every 6 months or so I get the itch, an itch that tells me I shouldn't be where I am, that there's another place with a better life waiting for me...somewhere. This way of thinking comes with the good and comes with the bad. The good being that I can say I've lived in and visited places all around the world and across the country. Australia, France, Sweden, Austria, Switzerland, Chicago, Ohio...you think the itch would have been scratched by now. The bad being the anxt that comes from such a feeling. The feeling that you don't belong where you are and where you've been for most of the last 5 years of your life. 

But...."Where ever I go there I am".

Church helps, a boyfriend helps, an abundance of good friends helps, a steady job probably would help if I had one...ah what a wrestless soul I have. 

I haven't been in Chicago 12 straight months and already I'm thinking about up-rooting again. Not any time soon of course but definately before this time next year...

I am such a girl.

Today I'm working at The Joyce Foundation which is right on Madison and Dearborn, a block away from State street, and since I eat throughout the day at the office I usually do a little window shopping in place of getting lunch. Today I found the two most beautiful peices I have come across in a while. This is what goes through a poor girls head when she's trying to justify buying two pieces of clothing that could pay her electic and gas bill for two months:

"You can't buy these Leigh, you're barely making rent this month"

"sure I can! I have a new job and I'm getting paid next week!'

"But you barely have any food in your kitchen"

'I can live off soup and peanut butter for the next month, if anything it'll help me look better in the clothes i buy!'

"Leigh you know you can't just eat that for a month"

"Ryan feeds me"

"don't even go there"

"But I waaaant it!"

"I know they're pretty but just put them back and you'll be glad to have that $150.00 safely in your bank"

"damn you conscience.....you're keeping me from looking good"

"I'm keeping you from being broke, hungry and estranged from your roommates."

"..."

"Ok?'

"ok...but I'm putting them on hold incase I win the lottery tonight or something'

"Great Comprimise'

'Shut up"

"ok"

...Gawd I can be such a girl.

Lack of Swoon in Chicago.

There are few things in life that I love more than Men in well Tailored clothing. Sadly living in a city that is made up of what seems to be relocated farm/frat boys, I don't see them on the street that often. This morning getting off the Train at Jackson, however, I spotted one: finely tailored, freshly pressed, perfectly coordinated light grey thinly pin striped suit....I staaaared at him, gaping at the perfect length and width of his trousers, the suit jacket that FOR ONCE was not to big in the shoulders, the shoes that matched the belt. I seriously lost myself for a moment.

Come on guys of Chicago! Let's learn how to dress eh? If you want to have pretty girls like me audibily swoon as they stare at you in your nice clothes...learn how to dress! Working in the loop this week has opened my eyes to some sad sad realities...maybe it's because I'm not at the higher end of the loop? Wait...no there are no excuses. Although I guess that's what I get for wanting to live in a city as laid back as Chicago. Next week I'll be going to NYC, I'll be sure to catch up on my eye candy there, for now, thank God for the Sartorialist.

May I also just mention that i love seeing kids dress like fashionable adults. i don't usually like talking about "My Kids" because I don't like getting ahead of myself....but I must say that when I get the opportunity you better believe that my kids will dress like little adults. When I was in Paris last summer I saw a lot of this, little kids wearing more than just Pink and leggings.

Swoon.

Some DO like it stinkeye

So I'm in this band and I think we're calling ourselves "Project Stink eye" but I kind of like just plain ole "stink eye" better....what do you think? 

We played our first gig last Saturday for a fundraiser, and there was a great turn out for a 3:00 pm show. People seemed to like us and were a little surprised to see like a "serious" band at an improv fundraiser.... (all the others seemed to be solos or duets) Anyways, we sounded good, despite my amp cutting out half way through. Me and Joel sang some pretty harmonies and I had a lot of fun slapping my bass. 

I've been having a hard time writing in this blog lately. Maybe because I have almost nothing exciting to write about, maybe because things are so crazy and strange that they're a little too odd to be writing in this blog, maybe I need to start being more candid with this thing, then you'd REALLY know how odd I am.

Like the fact that this week I'm helping run Vacation Bible school at my church, but come Friday and Saturday I'll be stage managing a show that involves magic, contortionists, fire eaters and burlesque dancers. Well....Jesus loves them all.

Day time and Night time.

Pandora just popped up "Where is my mind" by the Pixies....very fitting. 

I have been feeling very un-Leigh lately.....or maybe I'm finally acting like myself after a summer of feeling alienated....gawd who knows. All I know is that my life recently has involved odd sleeping hours, Dark Dark Warehouse rock and roll shows flask of whiskey in hand, Drinking boxed wine back stage with ladies after they've stripped down to only pasties and booty shorts, Volunteering at my church, working 12 hour days a week straight for a Psychoanalytical conference and learning how to be a single dating person......finally. 

My two little sisters are coming to visit/go to Lolapalooza this week. I'm stoked....hopefully they wont be too weirded out by my life here.

The guy in the painting is giving a stink eye if I ever saw. A guy I met this weekend named Nathaniel Loman did it. So give credit where it is due. 

No one cares when you talk about your Dreams

So if you know me very well at all you know that I'm rather affected by my dreams, I think this mostly has to do with the fact that I remember them so clearly and I think THAT has to do with the fact that I'm such a light sleeper and I wake directly out of REM sleep. Seriously all you have to do to wake me up is say "Leigh" and I'll go "What?", and if I don't respond I'm probably just pretending...

People think it's bull crap that certain things in your dream may represent what is happening in your waking life, but for me it all ends up working out. And when people tell you their dreams they're really telling you the deepest depths of their soul through a story, and telling a story is a much easier way to convey your emotions rather than just saying "My life is too overwhelming and I'm terrified of failing".  So instead we hear a story about a Blue row boat docked in a harbor outside your window and a parking lot that you ran through till you got to a room filled with your family and friends that was next to a pool that you jumped into and started to drown in. Because when you tell a story like that you think you're just telling it because it "was just so weird" when really you're exposing yourself like you wouldn't otherwise.

seriously, go to www.dreammoods.com  and in the little "Interpret" box type in one by one:

Blue

rowboat

parking lot

family

Drowning

and you'll know what the story I just told you is really about. 

Finding Worth at what age

I was talking to a kid the other day, a kid that is engaged mind you, a 19 year old kid who is on the brink of entering his 20's and desperately trying to get his shit together before he's responsible for the well being of his wife. He's a drummer and he decided that if his band/studio isn't off the ground and/or famous by the time he's 24 then he's going to give up and get a "real" job. I chuckled to myself at the thought of 24 being an age where people NEED to have their shit together, which in his case might be true, but I told him. "Dude, 24 is still really young, I'm 23 and I'm still trying to figure out exactly what I want to be when I grow up." 

It's too bad that young adults are fed this Idea that you need a "back up" in case what you really want to do doesn't work out, I think it keeps people from giving their 100 %, and (in my case) spreads people too thin. But anyways. 24 isn't it, you can still work towards your goals after that point, although it's good to have goals. But I think the idea of having an age limit is unnecessary.  I mean my uncle didn't realize that he wanted to be a nurse until well into his 50's.

So here I am, an unemployed creative type in her 20's trying to find some value that she has to her community.  And because a persons worth is usually attributed to their job or their responsibility to their family or significant other...I'm at a loss. I mean, I have things to do, I've assigned myself tasks, I have an internship and musical and otherwise creative endeavors, but no set schedule, no boyfriend or car or even a bike or a 9 to 5 and a bank account that is less than pleasing.  So I find myself wondering how I can feel valued with out the things that I have been taught give me value as a young woman in society. 

So let's see, I suppose I am valued as a:

Daughter

Sister

Friend

Musician

....I guess

I guess what I'm trying to say is: I would never want to re-live my 20's. especially my early 20's. 

When I told the kid this he acted suprised saying, "Really?!"

I just said, "Yeah dude, you'll see. It's the age where you grow up and have no Idea what to do and realize nobody else has a clue either."

Life is funny

And thankfully I have the ablity to laugh.

I have recently gotten a very exciting internship with Mo Roses production company. They put on shows like this:

Mom and Dad are so proud :)

I've been back in Chicago now for 6 months. Most of the time searching for jobs and things to keep me afloat. I've been trying to figure out what direction I should go in when I want to focus on both of my passions equally (music and Theater) then PLOP this thing falls in my lap. It's perfect, it's fun, it's small, it's paid, it's combining two of my favorite things ;)

you could be a model.

With one seat left she takes her place between a petite Mexican woman and a tall elderly man wearing what she imagines to be his denim uniform. As not to invade her neighbors personal space she leans forward and perches her elbows on her knees, not realizing that she's taken an almost photographic pose. The bus is absent of human voices until an old woman chimes shakily, "You're going to be a model, you're so tall and beautiful". Taken off guard, sheepishly she smiles and half whispers "Thank you" while a girl towards the front peers over and giggles. All of the sudden she's aware of herself and feels everyone on the bus looking to see if the old woman is right, she can feel them thinking "Tall, yeah, pretty? Eh". Subtly she recoils by folding her arms and slouching back, no longer concerned with brushing shoulders with her neighbors, hoping that the jeans and forest green beater she's wearing will help her to blend once again into the background. The bus whirs on and she get's off before the old woman does, but not before she informs her "Don't go on the train with those flip flops, they'll getcha". After years of being told she could "be a model" she wonders if she should follow her reply of "Thank you" with "But they don't take girls with bad skin and big butts". 

One of Four

I would just like to take this moment to mention how beautiful and funny and talented my sisters are. I miss them a lot and I'm really Jealous that they all get to hang out with each other in Ohio for the summer. I'm also a bit jealous that they all went to Cedar Point with out me...I'm gunna have to visit first chance I get. (From left to right Grace, Maddy and Bonnie)

Goofs.

Too long to submit to "textsfromlastnight.com"

When I get really bored, like say when I'm selling Merch for this guy at the Abbey, I get some A riffing material off of my friends.

For Example:

(216) Their Manager is really cute…

(719) FUCK!

(216) He’s running their sound board and he waved at me once…I think he’s the one

(719) I think it would be appropriate to call him Neo if you know what I mean

(216) He’s bending my spoon…if you know what I mean

(719) I want to take the blue pill if you know what I mean

(216) I don’t know what you mean

(719) I think I might be pregnant if you know what I mean

(216) FUCK THAT!

(719) That was not true please be calm

....it might only be funny to some but you get the Idea. When I'm making people laugh, weather it's at a get together or just a correspondence over texting, I feel more like myself. I feel like I haven't been my jokey self for the past couple months and I'm glad to see that it's returning, even though I'm making a fool of myself half the time... 

Green everywhere

I am exhasted. Not only did I work my butt off this weekend, I believe I'm also coming down with whatever Darcie and Ally have/had.

I worked at Green fest this weekend for Organic Valley, pretty awesome company, I got a bunch of free stuff from them. They had some of the Farmers from the family owned farms there and apparently some of the young handsome ones were at Deboinair this Saturday for a Green fest after party. I can only imagine the kind of Hipster tail those guys got/could have gotten. The only thing hotter than telling a young hipster girl "I'm an organic farmer"  is vaguely sounding like you just said "I'm in a band called Animal collective".

It's green outside now. The trees the grass, our front path....our yard no longer resembles a jungle because our land lord came on by with his machete and made it look like what I imagine the path in front of Jesus on palm sunday would have looked like. Nice. Now I just need a Donkey and I'm set. 

Things I'm excited about that are coming up:

-Womens weekend in Michigan

-Rebecca returning from Indonesia

-Mari Moving back

-Going to Texas to be with my adopted family

The only time Leigh will talk about sports...

The Indians are on in Chicago, but here they just call it an away White Sox game. Thankfully the Sox are doing horribly ;) Kyle Says the White Sox commentators are the worst, they're pretty bad. So I turn on WTAM 1100 on line, but they're broadcasting the Cavs game. All of the sudden I've turned into my father, one game is on the t.v. on Mute while the other is on the radio. Both Cleveland teams and both actually winning, the high light of my day. 

The Cavs just did a back to back sweep in the playoffs, I know NO ONE that reads this is a basketball fan and would rather see me write some drivel about music...but I am so gosh darn excited! I mean this would be the first time in 60 years that Cleveland has won a Championship title....I dunno but I would hope that that would do something for Cleveland's attitude towards itself.

Now I'm sitting here by myself in my Chicago living room watching the Indians play, we're winning at the top of the 9th and Progressive feild is barely full of die hard fans braving the freakishly cold weather to watch their team win for once, ah Cleveland. 

I've had an almost purely nostalgic relationship to sports for most of my life. Mostly because I'm a very Non-competitive person. Baseball was the sport my Father taught me and my sisters enough that we'd half heartedly play in the front lawn. Basball is the game that was a big treat to go to as a kid. One of my most favorite things to do in the woooorld is go to an Indians game, buy 2 hot dogs and a big bag of peanuts and end up with a huge mess of shells at my feet and a fresh burn on my cheeks. The Cavs didn't start doing really well until right before I went to College, I didn't go to my first game until I had already graduated and left for Chicago, But one of my favorite memories of this past year is going to the first pre-season game with my Dad, floor seats, hot dogs, Great Lakes Dortmunder and a loss against The Raptors. Now we're the best team in the league with the MVP and a city ready for a championship. I'm excited-d-d-d-d.

I don't know how to write about sports hahaha. Not to mention I haven't felt like myself lately and the playoffs has been a quick happy retreat for me to watch/listen to/read about. 

Too bad I'm a little terrified of Cubs fans, otherwise I'd indulge in my peanut endeavor here in Chicago more often.

Ok that's enough of that.

Cure for a gloomy Day

Today was pretty crap, but the little things are what made it all the nicer. 

That picture I took when you weren't looking as you made me Eggs that cold New York Morning. It's still on my phone. 

And an afternoon spent with one of my best friends, shooting the shit and talking about why that shit is just so shitty. 

Not to mention my Dad used his super Dad powers today and called me just to ask if I was ok. He's not really a caller, but it seems when ever he does, it's when I really really need it. Seriously, super Dad powers. 

I'm trying to improve my penmanship

So very few people have cool hand writing these days. The only thing we're ever forced to write constantly is out signature, and that usually ends up being a squiggle and a line...that's what mine is after all.

My Grandmother Culbertson has the most beautiful handwriting, she signs her paintings in the most beautiful and artistic way a person could write "Culbertson". So what I conclude is this: The longer you were forced to write things out without the aide of a computer or a typewriter, the better your hand writing is.

It's why most of the people in my generation have the same handwriting that they did when they were in 7th grade, because that's when we started our "keyboarding" classes.....just imagine what the hand writing of future generations will be like. In my old age, my doctors will be writing out perscriptions like pre-schoolers, if they write them out at all...

Pretty obvious right? I dunno I just thought it was interesting.

Stream of Conciousness

I am really Tired. It's not because I haven't been getting enough sleep because I actually have, I think it's because I'm not used to early mornings and consistently active days....I also think it's because I'm out of shape. So to change that I biked to work today. Five Miles from Logan square to the West Loop, woot! Now I'm really tired and praying I'll be sharp enough to make it home alive this afternoon. Two cups of caffinated tea should be kicking in any time now.

So yesterday on the commute home I did a lot of thinking, as I was too tired to pull out my logic puzzles and too packed in with people to sit down and gaze out the window, so I was left to my thoughts. I thought a lot about what was so great about this last weekend in Moreland Hills Ohio. How great it was to spend time with my family as a whole, be with my 3 sisters making jokes that inevitably might piss off Mom. The giggling in the pews of the Federated Church that never get old, hugs from Grandmas, Aunt Marty and Martines new springer puppy, Decorating eggs with my cousin and her fiancee, avoiding whatever elephant is in the room etc. It was great.

But then it all died down and I wanted to escape from everything. Sunday night came and I was scheduled to drive home around 6, about an hour before I was to get picked up I decided I wasn't ready to go back and bought a bus ticket for Tuesday morning. So, Bonnie got shipped back to MU Ohio, Maddy holed up in her room again, Moms attitude turned sour and I decided I wanted to get out of that house, hide from the place that I was using to hide from Chicago. Double hide. So I went to the Brodheads. The Brodhead family is my paralell Universe. They are a Family of four boys, my good friend Craig being the second as I am. They were all still home for the Holiday and I just got to sit and bask in the strangeness of all the differences and similarities of their paralell life. It was perfect. Their mother is an angel and never hesitates to let me know that their door is always open, and so are the doors to their enormous fridge filled with food. Their house is perched on a hill in the valleys of Gates Mills and over looks the rolling landscape as two Golden retreiver beasts roam about the house distributing love. In my last two days in Ohio I spent as much time there as possible, this included sleeping over, eating breakfast then napping there. I forgot all about the fact that I had bills to pay, a steady job to find, close to no food in my fridge in Chicago and just pretended this was life. It was healthy I think. And very needed for my soul.

Anyways, that's what I want.

And recently a lot of attention has been brought to setting goals. Career goals, life goals, etc. so here's a goal:

I want a house in the Valley where the door is always open and the fridge is always full. I want two or three loving dogs to roam about giving love to anyone that wants it, a cat too. I want a big room with every musical insturment and peice of equipment nessecary for impromtu music playing and enough spare beds for anyone to come and go as they please. I would love the house to have some semblance of a family in it but lets not get ahead of ourselves.

Deadline for this goal? let's say 35? That's 12 years from now. Lots of things need to happen for that to happen, but I think I can do it.

1 2 3
That's the speed of the seed
A B C
That's the speed of the need
You can dream a little dream
Or you can live a little dream
I'd rather live it
Cuz dreamers always chase
But never get it

-Aesop Rock

Yeah, thanks for listening.

I stole this from Sartorialist

Because I like to pretend I'm really really fashionable.

Job?
I get paid to Nanny, Temp, Direct, play music.

Best Sartorial advice from your parents?
Make sure you have your basic pieces.

Style icons?
Darcie Young? My friends? I can't think of any one famous person. Maybe Zoey Deschanel, Charlotte Gainsbourg, Cloe Sevingy.

Describe your personal style...
Classy Cheap chic. I've been trying to phase myself out of my overly experimental days at North Park. Although my uniform recently has been a deep V with skinny jeans and a blazer....it's just easy.

I build my daily look around?
What is comfortable and clean. If I'll be wearing it all day I'm not going to throw on tights and a high waisted belt.

Personal Style quirk?
half the stuff you'll see me wearing doesn't belong to me....I feel closer to the people who's clothes i wear.

Favorite designers?
I'm going to be honest here, I couldn't tell you.

Most cherished item?
Any Jewelry that my Mom or sisters have ever bought me.

Never caught wearing?
a baseball hat

Most underrated item in menswear/womenswear?
I'm going to have to go with Romney on this one.
"The perfectly tailored woven shirt, the slouchy trouser, and the leather biker jacket."

Dress to impress who?
My friends, strangers down town.

Flats or heels?
Well I'm a gargantuan so I'm going to have to go with flats. I do like how heels look though, I just have a hard time wearing them for longer than 30 minutes.

Favorite stores?
In Chicago - Clothing Optional, Vintage Leather, (really any of the second hand shops in Wicker Park) And I'm cheap so, H&M and forever 21. But when I want to look at and touch something beautiful with out feeling out of place - Anthropologie.

Your next "must have" purchase?
An Off White spring Trench, A deep purple leather hobo bag and Greek goddess sandals :)

I skimp when buying ...
Almost anything...

I splurge on...
Good fitting jeans, and when ever I find "THE" perfect thing (see below)

Favorite item of clothing?
My Velvet black blazer, Brown lace up oxfords and my Dark wash skinny jeans.

Favorite fashion magazines?
Nylon, Vogue, GQ (is that a fashion mag?) and Does The Sartorialist count?

Favorite (style) books?
I have a photography book from the Yeah Yeah Yeah's Nick Zinner. I love looking at that thing.

Favorite stylish movies?
The Royal Tenenbaums and The Science of sleep.

Favorite vacation spot?
Red Bay Ontario Canada. It's not very fashionable but my family is always there.

Favorite neighborhood restaurant?
Sultans Market....even though I don't live in Wicker Park.

Unlucky at cards....So they say

I realized today that when I think about finding the guy for me I think of finding "The Nino to my Amelie" and the "Stephane to my Stephanie". This of course is referring to the stories of "Amelie" and "The Science of sleep". I suppose it's because I imagine the guy I end up with being some one as strange if not stranger than me....and possibly French? 

Those things aren't mutually exclusive...

It's interesting to think of one's meeting of  their significant other as a potential "Story". I suppose it's what I want to happen, I suppose it's inevitable. But we forget so easily that love stories start with out us realizing it, the beginning is not seen until the very end. Yours could be happening right now and you could have no knowledge of it. 

My Parents for instance, their Parents used to play cards together while little Clark and Carolyn were running around as tots in the living room. It wouldn't be until 20 or so years later that they'd see each other in a bar in down town Cleveland, my Mother purposely bumping into my handsome father and my Dad fumbling for the words to mention to this gorgeous lady that he thought she was some one that, oddly enough, they both ended up knowing....

Foolishly I sometimes think that I'll see him and meet him and that will be it....but it'll be so much more frustrating and drawn out than that, as all of my love stories have been so far...all two of them....that I know of. Patience. 

Ok, that's enough Leigh.

Being single is sexy.

I wonder.

Why does this room smell funny...

Tonight

Was lovely.

It started out with my good friend Kristina. I met up with her at Marshalls where she was buying some fun unmentionables and from there we strolled to her place of work. There I applied for what will most likely be my job as an ice cream server at Bobtail. We had a lovely talk in the mean time and I got to sample some tastey ice cream. 

Then I ventured to my good friend Daves apartment, where I impressed him with my skills on Wii Baseball (meaning he didn't win by mercy rule only by a couple points) and I got a much needed does of 4 person Mario Kart, on which I did suprisingly well againt 3 more experienced boys. We enjoyed each others company emensely.

Next I left the boys to go see the Tim Lowly Ensemble. A band who's sound exeplifies Peace on a rainy day. I even started crying during one of the songs.

I needed to recall my lovely night because it ended with a girl getting attitude with me.

My night was pretty.

Diddle

I'm sorry I haven't gotten around to writing an entry since I moved here....it's not like I haven't had any time to do so, just not really the will. Isn't that usually how these things go?

The Job search is going and going, I mostly wish I had one so that when I go back to visit Ohio this weekend I could tell everyone what I'm doing instead of what I wish i were doing...or what I'm trying to do.  All I will say is that Nannying seems to be the most promising thing to come around.

I'm here at 3216 N Drake listening to "rainy day like" music, hanging out with Geeg. It's raining again for the umpteenth time this week, I still say I like it better than snow at this point. The sweatshirt I threw on this morning is that of a friend who gave it up Saturday night in order to keep me dry on the walk back to my place. Watching me pull it on he says "You look much better in that than me, you should just keep it". Wearing it makes me feel cared about by a good, old friend. 

I went and saw Watchmen on Sunday, I enjoyed it, I have my reservations about it, but I enjoyed it. Probably because I went in to it with such low expectations. I went and saw it with 7 other friends of mine....in Cleveland I had a hard time wrangling one person to see a film with me....at some point during the movie I remember just smiling at the fact that I was surrounded by such quality people, it made me endlessly happy. 

I have the possibility of two shows coming up. I'm defiantly playing at Femfest at North Park university in Java House March 27th at 7:30. So if you want to see my triumphant return please come and watch me attempt to play music in front of people again. I might possibly be playing with some folks at The Mutiny on April 30th along with The Clams who are for sure playing....so be there anyways. 

I returned to Barry Methodist Church on Sunday with Kate and I brought Darcie along. Right away I felt part of the community again. I now have a house to go to for Easter Dinner and it looks like some opportunities for babysitting in my future :) Barry is a great funky little artsy church community, I'm glad that Darcie will be coming with me every Sunday...not to mention that she has a car and she lives with me.

My Roommates of course are amazing women. Creative, responsible, sweet, creative, generous, beautiful, smart, funny, women. It's too bad we'll only be living together for 3 months...Not to mention there's a fantastic Dog here named Geeg. He helps me feel a little safer, and he's oh so adorable. 

I'm supposed to be here, I'm so happy that I am here. I've only been here 2 weeks and it's already been an explosion of creativity, shows, theater, friendship and endless blessings. Prayers that I'll find a job in the next week eh?

Much love to all. If you're not here, I really miss you.

How to:

Be a good neighbor;

 Driving home through my neighborhood I pass a 12 year old jogging up the hill by himself, he waved. I'll miss that in Chicago. 

Be a waitress;

   I wonder sometimes what people are thinking when I'm taking their order, bringing them water/coffee all day. I don't just wonder what they're thinking, I wonder what they've done that day, if it's been a good day, if they're going to see some one they love that day, if they are anxious about something they have to do after they leave this place. So I wish for one day that I could read the minds of my customers at work. I could get past the inevitable thoughts of "Damn this girls slow" or "Is this what I ordered?" or "Is that a piece of food on her face or a zit?" because I'm so interested in the story behind them. I remember driving home from a bass lesson with my Mom when I was younger and saying to her while driving through Shaker Heights "All these house's have a different story in them" "Yes they do sweetie, isn't that cool?"

Move to Chicago;

   I have a couple boxes packed, I plan on my preliminary trip to be next week. A day and a half to interview, look for a dresser and pick up a bed.

Show a boy that you like him;

   Send him something you had way too much fun making. He'll apparently not know what to do with himself, or what to do to thank you, just tell him that as long as he basks in your amazing card making skills, that's thanks enough.

Be a good friend;

Don't laugh too loudly when they're on the phone with some one who will probably get them in trouble....

Send text msgs like this in response to "I don't want to get up and go to work today"

"When we rise from sleep, let us rise for the joy of the true work we will be about this day, and considerately cheer each other on".

I've kept it in my phone for the past month :)

Write a song;

   Can I tell you just how terrified I am of writing music? Music is this one thing that comes terribly naturally to me and I can't bring myself to produce a song that I enjoy listening to. 

I was listening to Vampire weekend in the car today (a CD Nigel Burned for me that I gleefully stumbled upon, along with atlas sound, while looking through stuff yesterday) and...well...there aren't many songs on that album, so I ended up listening to the thing repeatedly. After about the 5th or 6th time through I started to think "These guys aren't that tight....this is really annoying to me all of the sudden...why the fuck is that?" Don't get me wrong I'm a huge fan of lo fi music, much to Jon's Chagrin, but every little sloppy note started to crawl under my skin. I kept listening to try and figure out why I enjoy this music, and how maybe I could sloppily, easily make something similar, but picking apart something so simple defeats the purpose of coming up with such a fun and free song, right?

 Maybe what annoyed me about the sloppiness of the song is that as a musician I've always strived for tightness. As a bass player I'm the time and meter that every ones listening to with out realizing it...the Drums being the more obvious toe tapping instigator. So to achieve that sound that is basically the subconsciousness of the band I need to listen and be tight with everyone else, Classically, Jazzically....Rock and Rollically....And I get angry when a Band like Vampire Weekend can make fun catchy music that isn't even that TIGHT while I sit here anxious to even open Ableton live! (That's music software) The curse of the classically trained musician I guess...I need to get the fuck over myself.

I've been thinking a lot recently about the anatomy of a song. What makes songs like The Walkmens "The Rat"or Battles "Atlas" so powerful to me? Why does it FEEL so obvious to me that what goes into a good piece of music and a good piece of theater is structurally the same thing....yet it is terribly difficult to DESCRIBE. 

Be a good Director

The play was a success. The Cast had discussions with the Audience in small group form after each performance, and it seems that it did a lot of good. I think I did my part in decreasing the Bullying in Mayfield Middle school. And I enjoyed watching the kids in the audience jam out to LCD soundsystem and Cadence weapon, as they were the interludes for the production. The kids are great, we're facebook friends now, and I finally told them where I waitress ;)

Have fun Babysitting

Waltz with the one year old boy to "Once Upon a dream" In the opening credits of Sleeping Beauty. Spider man swing the 3 year old boy, and fairy fly the 2 year old girl into bed. I promise you'll have fun.

Musing of a New Director

   Thank the lord this Monday my first (paid) gig as a director will be over. The performance is of a play I've simply dubbed "Bully Play" which was found somewhere on the Internet and then cut clipped and butchered to better fit the needs of the school by my Boss. 

It wasn't until yesterday during our "dress" that I looked at this play and thought, "God this is just an awful play and I am so fucking sick of it". I purposely did not let myself think this

 thought until this moment because otherwise it would have turned into something boring and unpresentable....it doesn't seem to have become that. I remember thinking when taking this job that I just love working with highschoolers. And I do! But the instance in which I last worked with them was at a sleep away camp, where parents and transportation were not in question....note to self: build better communication with parents the next time you work with school age Children. Because of these kids parents I've had so many last minute "OH my mom JUST told me that I have an orthodontist appointment after school, I can't come to practice" or "OH I didn't show up with out telling you because my Mom wouldn't LET me come to rehearsal because of my bad grades" this AFTER (both the kid and the parent) signed a contract that states they wont get paid if they miss more than one rehearsal with out telling me TWO days in advance......

ALL that said, I really like the kids I'm working with, they're kind to me and to each other, they're probably the kids I'd be friends with in high school, and they seem to think I'm cool in some sense. And I worked with what I had and made it into something that I think Middle schoolers will at the very least pay attention to. If ONE kid walks away from this play having learned that they should be nicer to a kid that is quiet, or doesn't have any friends or smells funny....then I've done my job. And we're showing the play to the entire 5th and 6th Grade so....there's a good possibility that that will happen. 

Would I do anything differently? Yeah. I'd probably get a second person in there with me from the beginning. Get some kid to take blocking notes for me, line notes, keep track of the contracts, permission slips etc so I could pay attention to the play more. I'd give the kids copies of their contracts so they'd remember what it is they signed on to do. I'd call all their parents from the beginning and make sure they understand what THEY signed on to do and establish some sort of a relationship with them so they know I'm not joking around here. And I'd require practices to be lengthened the last two weeks of rehearsals. 

Maybe I'll get some one to film the thing and I'll YouTube it....or maybe I'll be way too embarrassed to do that. 

------------------------------------------------------------

Me and Dave went for a walk in snowy sunny Jackson Field yesterday, it was beautiful and refreshing and the best exercise I've gotten in a while. I'm going to miss the hills and the trees pretty badly when I move to Chicago...I might just go for a walk again today. 

(The Photo is from a less sunny trip to Jackson Field)

Now THAT's funny.

   I seem to find a lot of things funny these days that aren't intended to be. I mean that is usually the case, but recently the unintentional funny things have been out weighing the intentionally funny things. 

like. .

My Mother frantically screaming as she shuffles through papers all over the house;

"THERE WAS A FROSTY CUPON THAT HAS SOME VERY IMPORTANT ADDRESSES ON IT and now it's GOOONE!!"

"This is what people have blackberrys for mom"

"I thought if I wrote the Address on MY COUPONS that it'd be SAFE! But NOOOOOO I write it down and a week goes by and it's GOOOONNEEE! I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT!"

mean while I am laughing in the kitchen making eggs and she does NOT think this is a laughing matter.

 It's how I survive really, laughing at things that are loud and kind of scary, but when you think about it, really funny. I can't get wrapped up in the crazy that happens in my house every other day anymore, it's bad for my health. So growing up here I've learned to laugh at things that are so over the top scary crazy, embaressing or angering because 6 times out of 10, it's not actually worth it to get anxious or upset about it.

I picked up a little saying from a friend, "Find the Funny". because there's something funnyto find  everyday.

Oddly enough the friend that I got that from stopped being my friend in a pretty laughable situation, it's mostly the relationship that he's in that's laughable.

This makes me kind of crazy right? I swear I have other emotions.

However, my Cast not knowing their lines a week before the performance....that's not funny too me. 

I LIKE IT STINK EYE!

I love you two.

My life is so much better with you guys in it.

I am moving to Chicago so help me God

The Date is set, the deal is made. I'm moving in with Miss Young and Miss Burns in their Logan square apartment this March. It is going to be fabulous. 

Obviously I have been planning this for quite some time now, but I'm still pretty amazed that it's kind of coming together. Darcie offering me this room for one thing is a God send. I'll be talking to people about Jobs everyday till I get there, not to mention I'll probably mosey on over there as soon as I can for some interview type things, and everything will hopefully come together and my move there will be successful and permanent. 

So I'm sitting here doing the math, making sure everything will be in place, planning my close to perfect life in Chicago. I'm mentally preparing myself for living frugally, which entails eating mostly Zaterans rice mixes and drinking mainly PBR. as well as figuring out how I'm going to chase a boy that lives states away as I thrive in the city of my choosing

....is it weird for Girls to chase Boys? Like in a non-playground kind of way.....it's ok I think, especially since this particular boy has been chasing me on some level for roughly 5 years....So the goal is that I give chase with out feeling insane, which will obviously be difficult. SO let me know if you want to road trip it to New York City any time, any time at all.

This Month is going to be all about problem solving, though I suppose that's kind of what life is about, but this month in particular I will be deliberately solving each problem that needs to be taken care of before I move to Chicago, there seems to be quite a few. BUT I AM DETERMINED!

My brain is dying. I didn't leave the house all day today, mainly because it snowed and work was cancelled, also because I didn't have access to a car all day, frustrating. So my brain is dying. my motivation to paint, read, play music, write, do logic puzzles, whatever... is dwindling...I hate it. Make it come back. 

I don't care who you are or how good you think you may be, when I get to Chicago, we're playing music together.

New York...

was

Perfect.

And life is even more complicated.

Leigh goes to town

So I roll over this morning to check the time on my cell phone, and just as I open it it starts to ring, it's always weird when that happens. Of course it's Jon calling to tell me that in the few moments that he's been waiting in line in NYC to buy tickets to see Mary-Louise Parker in Heda Gabler, he's brushed shoulders with Will Ferrel and given a knowing nod to Lauren Graham (from Gilmore Girls.....one of Jons Favorite Shows). Well....good morning NYC.

Meanwhile I'm here eating poached eggs on toast, making all my friends into Mii's on the Wii (yes you have one) and wandering around my house trying to get my big ole fingers to change from the chorus to the bridge on the Ukulele for "Postcards From Italy"

.....I'm not Jealous Jon, I just can't wait to go to New York in two weeks I guess.

I do have rehearsal again with my high schoolers today, it's become a fun little thing to look forward too. I think one of the kids Dads is bringing in Pizza for everyone today, what a great life I lead.

People Leigh hangs out with Tracker:

Kate Got Back from New York last night
Daniel Got back from God-knows-where yesterday
Ryans here
David Returns from Egypt some time next week

Thankfully you can learn anything on Youtube to pass the time.

A Stink Eye and a Cute

A Brilliant Stink Eye Provided by Hel looks




And A Cute.



So I'm still trying to figure out if high schoolers are your toughest critics or easily impressed (by 23 year olds) I played the first half of "Postcards From Italy" on the ukulele for them and they were speechless. One of the Characters plays the thing in the play I'm directing.

So I'm very confident that what I'm doing looks very impressive and professional to them, while at the same time I feel like they're thinking "Does this girl have any Idea what she's doing?".

In any case, I'm a paid Director, I get paid to do what (roughly) I want to do for a career. And though it isn't much....I'm feel'n pretty good about it.

Insufferable in Moreland Hills

"You absolutely need a musician, you know that right?"
"Yes I know, I need it."

-

"I'm sure I've warned you about musicians, I mean, you should know"
"Know what? What wouldn't I already know about musicians.."
"If the opportunity to tour ever came up, or some opportunity like that..."
"...Gone in a second"
"But you're a musician yourself, so it's not as bad"
"I can be on the same brain wave if need be."

-

"The continuation of my Craigducation"
"I'm Leighrning some things as well"
"We are so fucking witty"


I'm feeling a little out of my damn mind.

Happy new year Friends and Foes

Anxious musings of the new year are in order.

I believe it's safe to say that the last week of 2008 was one of the most fantastic weeks I'd had all year. It was packed with people I love coming together in roughly the same places, passions I hold for music, Theater, and persons a-like were re-kindled and premonitions for the new year were made. It was a much needed burst of energy at the end of a very pivotal year, almost as if it was saying, "Big finish! Big finish! Big Finiiiiish!!" now it's 2009, and I think it's going to be terrific. I'll Move to Chicago, I'll start my career, I'll fall in love, I'll produce mass amounts of art, I'll maybe even get a dog. It'll be a good year.

Not to mention Obama is going to be President in less than a month! Ahh! My heart is a flutter!

Although one sacrifice was made to the New years Gods......I'm still hoping it'll turn up though....Notice there are no photos on this post as I am in mourning.